How I Lost My Dad To Cancer And Got Pregnant In The Same Year

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Photo By: Luis Ibarra Photography

 

Today, I celebrate my oldest turning 8 years old! I can’t even grasp how fast time goes,  but, I’m so honored to see Skyler-Ian grow into a genuine, well-mannered gentleman. See, I believe Skyler was destined for a greater purpose than I had ever imagined. I know he was placed on this Earth for a positive reason, to change those around him for the better. See, I firmly believe that Skyler-Ian’s purpose was to change me for the better.
In December 2008, just freshly 20 years old, I found out I was a little over a month pregnant (out of wedlock). To make matters a little more complicated, per say, I had just lost my Dad to cancer just 6 months prior. I was in the middle of my sophomore year in college and was thriving in my entertainment career — well within my second season promoting & skating for the NHL. I was also working a healthcare job simultaneously. I had my plate pretty full!


I was “seeing” my on again, off again boyfriend cautiously. Well, I guess not cautious enough – obviously. We weren’t together at the moment I found out I was pregnant, but, things drastically changed when I did found out I was. There was a whirlwind, unexpected move to a different state in one day, unexpectedly quitting my jobs and leaving school. Enrolling in an out of state college & using the last of my savings to only afford ONE class! It was a struggle. I was grateful for the support of my Boyfriends family — his Grandparents, Sister & Mom during this sudden change.

I was blessed to have met a group of kids on my first day of my college class and they made me feel so welcomed!! The next six months, consisted of an impromptu Vegas-style wedding, walking to and from my school to my boyfriend (turned Husband’s) job. And, moving back home to AZ after completing my college class.

The beginning trimester of my pregnancy was the hardest, anxiety-filled struggle- EVER! It was in that moment I felt the most alone, afraid & uncertain of who I was, what I was meant to do. My faith was shaken to the core, in certain moments I no longer had faith or believed in God. I questioned myself daily & wasn’t confident I was able to be a Mother or Wife. I was in and out of the hospital due to stress, anxiety and other minor complications. At one point we thought I miscarried.

After moving back to AZ we started to settle into our norm. The pregnancy sped up and before we knew it on August 13, 2009, at 12:44 am my whole world changed.. for the better. I welcomed a bouncing, baby boy into the world! He came into this world surrounded by loved ones, a lot of eager Families. And, a lot of Friends who waited for hours in the waiting room of the hospital.


It was when I held him for the first time all my insecurities & worries disappeared. I realized he was put in my life for a reason. Our journey to learn and grow together begun. The first couple of months into the first year, I swear I had no idea what I was doing. Skyler-Ian changed who I was. When my Dad died I lost my way, forgot who I was & wasn’t confident in my purpose. But, Skyler-Ian taught me to be selfless, to be more patient, caring and learned to love stronger than before. And, he brought back my faith.


Today, Skyler-Ian still continues to teach me. I couldn’t be any prouder and blessed to have him in my life. He is an amazing, proud big Brother & loves and thinks of his siblings before himself. I don’t know how lucky I got with Skyler.


My dreams and wishes for him are to continue to thrive, grow and learn. To follow his dreams & goals no matter what they may be. My heart is SO full knowing that he is able to do the things he loves and I get to watch him flourish.

I know our journey is still in the beginning stages. But, I know we can only go up from here. Happy 8th Birthday, SIR!

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